Are you coping with Grief?
Are you here because you are feeling down and not able to lift your spirits?
Coping with a recent death? I know what grief feels like too.
In 1989 I lost my Dad, after he contracted Legionnaires Disease. This had similar symptoms to covid19.
I did not understand the process of grief. I now reflect on Dad’s death and know that it changed me in subtle ways that I did not recognize at the time.
Bereavement and loss planted roots in my lifelong interest in complementary medicine. The importance of a positive mindset became clear.
More recently in June 2018 my Brother-in-Law died in his bed unexpectedly, aged 52, from pneumonia
And then a double blow to our family in September 2018 my grief-struck Father-In-Law died. Heartbroken after losing Michael he had lost the will to live. So, I know what grieving is all about. My husband lost his brother and Dad in the space of 3 months.
Covid19 brought about many deaths. Many unexpected.
The feelings of grief can occur with any change to your life. Divorce, moving, or changing jobs. Grief can affect us in different ways.
I am not a grief councillor but if you would like to talk to me I’m available to listen.
4 Dimensions of Death
We all deal with grief in a wide variety of ways involving the four (4) dimensions of our lives:
Pain and raw emotions are very real.
Give Yourself Time and Space
You need time to grieve. You could use mindfulness to help focus on the goodness of life and it’s OK to cry a lot.
We go through similar emotions.
Guilt– for the things you did or didn’t say or do
A deep sadness – often feeling “dead” inside
Shock and disbelief – why me, why us?
Fear of the future – how will I continue?
Anger against the circumstance or the people that took your loved one away from you.
Physical ailments and emotional dysfunction.
You may lose or gain weight. Feel sick. Suffer from infections because your immune system is suffering. Feel exhausted and it’s not uncommon to suffer from insomnia. Aches and pains that you very rarely had before the event.
Here are 6 ways that may help you cope with your grief:-
1. Talk to someone about your feelings. A friend, a family member, or a trained professional.
2. Make some lifestyle choices that will help you take control.
3. Find some new ways to cope with insomnia.
4. Listen to well-being podcasts. Read some books about grief so you understand what you are going through.
5. Search for mindfulness videos on YouTube or find a mindfulness class.
6. Stick to a routine so that you get up, get dressed, and get exercise each day.
Looking after yourself is not a “waste” of time, it’s part of the journey of grief, and remember you are not alone.
My own experience backed this up. Although back in 1991 I had no knowledge or understanding of what or how self-care was so.
I’ve now spent over 25 years as a massage therapist and I’ve spoken with many people suffering from grief.
Why not book a massage? The human touch will help to diminish your feelings of empty space and connect you with the rest of your body. Time will heal but you may need to help it along.
I have empathy for what you are saying and feeling and I would like to help in some small way.
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